IF IT'S CALLED A REMOTE CONTROL, WHY CAN'T IT CONTROL MY VOMITING?

Sorry remote... You were asking for it.

One thing I hate most about electronics is their lack of ability to control my vomiting.  This stupid remote is no exception.

First of all, I definitely hit pause while vomiting, yet I continued to throw up half-digested Fancy Feast, some windowsill bugs, and a cocktail olive.  Secondly, we could debate all day whether or not eating Fancy Feast, some windowsill bugs, and a cocktail olive made me throw up in the first place.  Fortunately, that’s not up for debate right now.

Here are some other great electronics to throw up on:
#1.) Any.
#2.) See #1.

If you want to go above and beyond, try eating a product and throwing it up on to another.  Like yesterday, when I swallowed a flash drive and then threw it up onto a laptop.  I refer to it as a “file transfer.” 

If the rewind button on this stupid remote worked, I’d relive that moment every day.